Getting ready for war?

Growing up in church and going to camp you hear about putting on the armor of God.  Each piece has a different meaning but the one that stands out (and the only one I can recall from memory) is that the Bible is your sword.  There is also armor that must be put on for parents with a child with a disability. 

The sword (or AK-47) for this person would be the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA).  The ADA is written to ensure equal opportunity for people with disabilities in various aspects of their life.  The ADA has crossed my mind a few times within the last 24 hours.  There is a possibility we will be trying to fly to Florida in the near future.  Flying with children can be difficult itself but add in a touch of Autism, not knowing how he will react to everything and a heightened sensitivity of the airline and passengers to disruptions.  I foresee some prepatory communications with the airline and determining what I need to do to make it an enjoyable trip for all of us.  Another incident happened this morning when my husband commented that he didn't know if he would have the opportunity to coach Christopher in soccer.  My immediate response was that he could play soccer and we'd hire some high school kid to be on the field with him as his one-on-one and the league would have to make accomodations.

Another piece of armor would be night vision goggles.  These aren't for us to see our children not sleeping or to watch them sleep after a particularly stressful day but a tool to see things through their eyes.  When you have a non-verbal child or child with limited communication skills you have to learn to see through their perspective to understand them and their desires.  When your child is crying for no apparent reason or saying something you can barely understand, you have to look at it from their point of view to understand it.

We also need to be equipped with a good communication system.  Many times the parents are the only voice of the child with disabilities.  It is our responsibility to make sure their needs are being met and that they are treated properly.  The communication system also includes codes and signals.  We have to be cued into our children for signs of an upcoming meltdown and that they may need something.  We also have to be their voice and at times their translators.

The last thing I'm going to discuss in this post is the uniform of normalcy.  (There may be future references to this topic but I'm going to stop here).  Parents teach every child how to behave but when there is autism involved it is a little different.  Most children will have an emotional response when they see someone crying or laughing.  The child with autism may require a lot of prompting to take notice and then would not know how to respond unless taught.  It also takes longer to teach appropriate behavior.  Many parents avoid situations that will be difficult for their child.  We avoid going to certain places to eat because of the wait time involved and it does not have the food choices he will eat.

So there is some initial equipment needed to fight this war that I wake up to every day.  Most days its pretty easy but I live, eat and breathe autism.  It is a part of who I am.